So I have a new girlfriend. She's a truck driver who handles a huge 18-wheeler. While she's driving she listens to Japanese language tapes and in her spare time practices the ukelele. She's extremely witty, and clever, and intelligent, and sexy as hell. "The Driver" is originally from Hawaii and of Chinese, Japanese, Hawaiian, and Portuguese ancestry. She has a 7-year-old daughter who lives in Alaska with her ex (who legally adopted the child). They have a cordial relationship and "The Driver" gets the daughter over the summer and provides full monetary support. I met her daughter briefly and she was sweet and imaginative and very polite.

And yes, after just a few days we dropped the L-word. It's been quick and intense and scary as hell, but I really do love this girl and want to make a future work with her. Crazy isn't it? No, really, it's crazy.

Here's where it gets crazier. I am going on the road with her for a couple of weeks -- me, one carryon, a computer (with only occasional net access), a camera, and a kitty-cat costume (don't ask), are going to live in a trailer and shower at truck stops for an undetermined period of time. Apparently there are betting pools on how long I will last, but while I'm acting crazy in love I might as well be hard-core about it.

Here's a picture of my pretty gf:


Femmecon was wonderful, especially meeting bias_cut and hanging out with chreebomb and chitinous. Performing for the femmes was the highlight of the weekend; they were the best audience ever.

I'll try to post from the road. I leave on Friday.

I HATE HATE that Katy Perry "I kissed a Girl" song. 1) Ummm yeah Jill Sobule already made that song like 10 years ago and 2)Way to reinforce heteronormativity....it's not subversive people.

1) My TV has a "half-mute" function which makes it really quiet but still audible. Haven't quite figured out the use of this function except maybe it is useful for multi-tasking, but I like it.

2) When you don't have cable, "Half&Half" isn't a bad show.

3) I recently decided (once again) that Neil Patrick Harris is a hot piece of ass. His brilliant stint on Password is what did it for me.

4) "Ain't no party like my Nana's tea party (hey,ho)" bonus points to those who get this reference without cheating

5) I could live back in B-more if it wasn't so.damn.hot.

Aight femme-con-ers. I'm gonna turn 31 over femmecon weekend and I would like to make plans to have a wild time with my lj friends. I was thinking that if Chicago has decent strip clubs I would like to go to one (I think/hope the dancers would appreciate a bunch of hot femmes stopping by to say hello). If a good "queer-girl-friendly" strip club is not available than any kind of dancing wit da gayz is a brilliant plan.

I hope y'all will be willing to celebrate with me. If you know of any places to go, let me know. If you don't know, but are willing to come out with me, let me know and I will send an official evite closer to the date (8/15)

Also, chreebomb and chitinous, your panel is on my list of places I want to be.

P.S. What do y'all think about a sexy, campy, big hair act to "Big, Blonde, and Beautiful" from hairspray. I especially like the line "cuz big is back and black is beautiful"

Taken from http://www.racialicious.com/ by by Carmen Van Kerckhove,/b>

A couple of weeks ago I found myself feeling really angry and rundown, but I couldn’t put my finger on what exactly was causing these emotions.

It was unusual for me because despite my Type A tendencies, I’m actually pretty laid-back. I’ve always been good at processing negative feelings (anger, sadness, resentment) quickly and getting them out of my system in order to move onto more productive pursuits.

I’ve written before about the importance of focusing on the human cost of racism instead of dealing only in abstractions, but an email I received from my friend Pamela Slim made me realize that I seem to have underestimated the impact of racism on my own psyche. Here’s what she wrote:

I believe very much that the work you are doing has an underlying role of healer. The history and related emotional energy that created race tensions today (slavery, genocide, rape, subjugation) is extremely deep and powerful. There is no way to do the work you do and not feel some of that energy. It is not for the faint of heart. And many, many people are afraid of it, whether they want to admit it or not.

Healers in my husband’s tradition do a lot to protect themselves and stay grounded in what they are doing. So make sure you always are kind to yourself, connected to your greater purpose and clear that what you are doing is facilitating this interaction, not controlling it. This may take the sting out of taking things personally.

Many, many people from different backgrounds are thankful that you are doing this work on their behalf. Visualize their faces and hands on your back when you feel down. Trust me, they are there.

Inspiring

HAWT!!!

See y'all at Femmecon...actually you'll see me in all my titty glory. I'm going to need act advice. I got a couple of ideas.

Dear Esteemed Artists,
It is with great pleasure that I write to invite you to participate in my favorite of the three shows that will happen this year as part of Femme 2008: the dirty late night cabaret. (Note that this is not the official title! This will be thought up and announced soon!)

In thinking about the shows I wanted to produce for Femme 2008, it was my vision to have a wild late night cabaret featuring brilliant artists from all over the country presenting work of definitely a night time nature (burlesque, mystery, magic, crazy tricks, etc). Your submissions were highly regarded by the Performance Committee, and definitely fit the bill for the late night cabaret!

Here are the details. The show will take place at 11pm at The Empty Bottle (1035 N Western Ave in Chicago) and will run for a little over an hour in length.

This is something I've been thinking about for a while. I have been trying to think of a way to articulate how to explain how statements that supposedly "aren't racist" have racism as a communal unconscious core. It's like racism acts as a word bank, and we all have this racist word bank in our unconscious which we can pull from when needed.

Let me give a couple of examples:

One that might be dated but still applicable is the Imus "nappy-headed ho" controversy. Imus could have called those women anything, he could have chosen any set of words to insult or deride those women -- "amazonian bitches," "manly bulldykes,"...whatever. But his racist wordbank provided him with the immediate combnation of racially charged words.

Barack Obama or any other black person as "articulate." Again, the word bank. I believe the thought process goes something like "what word can I use to describe this man who speaks effectively, with intelligence, and in a way that is accessible to the public?" go to word bank "Well this guy is black and the word that most fits that situtation is... "articulate" (with proper dose of surprise).

You see where this is going. I'm sure this idea isn't original, but perhaps the "word bank" image is.

For my burlesque class I was reading Dita Von Tease's Burlesque and the Art of the Tease (pretty pictures). Anyway, there is the part in it where Dita talks about painting her nails in the "half-moon" or "reverse french manicure" popular in the 20s - 40s. Here's some pics:

http://blogdorfgoodman.blogspot.com/2007/09/baby-moons-by-melanie-parker-half-moon.html

http://www.makeuplovesme.com/2007/09/nail-files-half-moon.html

Basically, the nail is painted either clear or pale pink (for the natural look) or vampy red, except the half-moons at the bottom of the nail bed are left plain or painted white.

The timing of this trend 1920-1940s got me thinking about whether this fashion trend was linked to some kind of proof of or performance of whiteness. I have always heard that you can tell if someone is black but "passing" for white, by their looking at their nailbeds. In addition, many many literary sources at the time point to the nailbed as a place to discern racial passing.

I haven't found any concrete internet proof to connect this nail-painting trend to proof of white racial identity, but I did find this excerpt from my bestest friends at Google Books

From Werner Sollars Neither Black, Nor White, Yet both
For some authors the sign [fingernails] is permanent, indelible, ineffaceable. According to others it can be covered, erased, deleted, or otherwise removed; thus Mark Twain lets his character always wear gloves.

The excerpt then goes to talk about a character in a book called Colcorton written in 1944 who has been passing for white "she had bruised [her fingernails] with a stone to make white marks come that she could play like they was moons"

Sollars then quotes texts which suggest "the use of nail-polish may be a possible cover for the racial marks on the fingernails"

Anyone else know anything about the half-moon manicure? What do you think of its contemporary use as a fashion statement by those trying to achieve a "retro" look?

My belly is still pleasantly full from the Chicken Pad Thai that I got from average neighborhood Thai restaurant. I always have interesting interactions when I go there (usually for pick-up). Tonight the cashier asked me if I was born in Australia (har har har), when I said no he told me that he has another customer (hee I was going to say client) whose name is Paris because she was born in France.

But the delicious Chicken Pad Thai is worth any amount of chatty mcchattyness. I planned on eating half and saving half for tomorrow, but you know my ass ate the whole thing.

In other news, I'm starting my burlesque class for WOC. It's 2/25 between 2-5pm in Capitol Hill. Locals, drop me a line if you know anyone who might be interested.

Lately I'm obsessed with cereal with chocolate in it. For the last couple of weeks I was all about that Special K with Chocolatey (and yes they are very specific to call them chocolatey) pieces. This week I am all about chocolate chex. Chocolate cereal is like the best dessert/breakfast evar.

I was tricked into visiting a Mary Kay lady. Those chicks are wiley. She was just so nice and earnest that I felt like I would be a horrible person if I didn't go. As it was, I was afraid my cynicism would ruin her new bamboo floors. You know I bought some facial crap. I think it makes me break out worse. But my Mary Kay lady conscious is clean and blemish free.

Aight, I need some cereal.

The Album Meme...yum

instructions:
1 - Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

3 - Go to flickr's "explore the last seven days" http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Put it all together, that's your first album.

I don't blame you. I would miss me too. I was just lamenting this morning that I am out of the loop on all y'all's business.

I don't know whose dating who, who has left who, who has gotten into grad school, who is moving, who is still militant, who is gonna be my baby daddy/mommy....and where are all the tittay shots?

Yes, y'all have been missed.

But here's what's going down.
-I passed my written PhD exams (got the notice today) and my orals (hee hee) are scheduled for next Tuesday.

-books.google.com is da bomb.

-I'm goin to Cabo on 12/16 so I can be golden again instead of my winter yellow-grey

-kyooverse owes me a sweet potato pie

Love you love you love you!!!
-Me

Okay. Quick entry, quick list:

1) Despite my bitching I was accepted into Teaseorama. I am performing on Satuday 10/6 if any of y'all are going to be in the SF Bay Area.

2) The Kaleidoscope Women of Color Show was awesome. I had the pleasure of meeting and hanging out with the amazing burlesque legend Miss Toni Elling Check out that pic of her leaning back on the stool. She is amazing and a crazy-ass broad at 79! I had a blast!

3) Been studying books on my exam list an making my syllabus for the Critical Whiteness Class I decided to teach in the fall. I don't know why I put myself through this torture, can't I just be a nice girl and teach Emily Dickinson?

4) Went back to MD to see the fam. Had a good time, ate a lot of food.

5) Apparently on Blackfolk I have been nominated for Playette of the Year. rubyphoenix always kicks my ass with her delicious tatas so I'm not even campaigning. Though I know that if I had live twirling video it would be on!

Aight, that should be enough to quench i_dreamed_i_was panting for some of my sweet, sweet, lj lovin'

"Portly" is the new Fat.

I love it.
Please take note.

It's always kind of shocking to me how consistently I score on these tests. I always float somewhere between introverted and extroverted (but as I get older I lean more towards introverted I think because I am a misanthrope). Other than that, I've scored the same since I was 13.



INFP - The "Dreamer" Myers-Briggs Personality Types (Free Test)
INFPs are introspective, private, creative and highly idealistic individuals that have a constant desire to be on a meaningful path. They are driven by their values and seek peace. Empathetic and compassionate, they want to help others and humanity as a whole. INFPs are imaginitive, artistic and often have a talent for language and writing. They can also be described as easygoing, selfless, guarded, adaptable, patient and loyal.

"Fun" Facts
"INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life."
- Portrait of an INFP (The Personality Page)

Real INFP People
Aldous Huxley - English author
Amy Tan - author (The Joy-Luck Club)
Audrey Hepburn - actress (Breakfast at Tiffany's)
Dick Clark - television personality
Fred Rogers - Mister Rogers' Neighborhood
Fred Savage - actor (The Wonder Years)
George Orwell - author, journalist
Helen Keller - deaf/blind author, activist, lecturer
J. R. R. Tolkien - writer (Lord of the Rings)
James Taylor - singer-songwriter, guitarist
John - Disciple of Jesus
John F. Kennedy, Jr. - lawyer, journalist, publisher
Laura Ingalls Wilder - author (Little House on the Prairie)
Lisa Kudrow - actress ("Phoebe" on Friends)
Mary - Mother of Jesus
Mia Farrow - actress
Neil Diamond - musician
Peter Jackson - filmmaker (Lord of the Rings)
Princess Diana - Princess of Wales
William Shakespeare - English poet and playwright

What I want to know is "how do they know?" I mean, I'm pretty sure Mary didn't take the Myers-Brigg so are they just going by there knowledge of these people? And where does their "knowledge" some from? Seems shady. And then the whole fictional people thing is just weird too. I mean I matcg with cartoons and an alien.

Fictional INFPs (Characters)
Anne - Anne of Green Gables
Bastian Balthazar Bux - The Neverending Story
Calvin - Calvin and Hobbes
Deanna Troi - Star Trek: The Next Generation
E.T. - E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial
Fox Mulder - X-Files
Tommy Pickles - Rugrats
Wesley Crusher - Star Trek: The Next Generation


INFP Career Matches
INFPs are often happy with the following jobs which tend to match well with the Dreamer/Visionary personality.

Activist
Actor
Artist
Counselor
Editor
Educational Consultant *** would love to have this job!!
Fashion Designer
Filmmaker
Holistic Health Practitioner
Human Resources
Journalist
Legal Mediator
Librarian
Massage Therapist *** I hate touching people.
Musician
Photographer
Physical Therapist ***again with the touching
Psychologist/Counselor
Researcher
Social Scientist
Social Worker
Teacher/Professor
Translator/Interpreter
Writer

Ginger Snapz was featured in a half page photo on page 24 of the Pride Issue of SF weekly. I brought like 4 copies home, but if you have an old copy laying around check me out!

3 things I disagree with:
1. I'm much more artistic than engineering
2. I'm so NOT liberal (I would think that I am more radical or even socialist)3. I think I'm pretty damn hot, but they probably rated me down because I'm fat

3 things I thoroughly agree with:
1. Totally an Old Geezer
2. Yup I'm greedy
3. I am an introvert

1. Yesterday I was at KFC (yeah, yeah PETA, hormone injections, chickens with 5 wings, blah blah blah). Anyway, sometimes a woman just needs some fried chicken. Got chicken and a biscuit, and said biscuit came with margarine and "Colonial's Honey Sauce." Yes, friends, not honey, but "Honey Sauce" which consistsed on High Fructose Corn Syrup, water, coloring, etc. I am facinated by this product.

2. There are many foodstuffs that I like. By foodstuffs I mean highly processed not actual food -- as far from nature as possible. One particular favorite foodstuff is Pizza Bagels. I cannot praise these little gems of tasty grossness enough. I am eating them now.

3. At my local Albertsons, in the shredded cheese section, they have a GIANT bag of "Shredded Pizza Topping". I am afraid of this bag. It looks like a "Brave New World" version of cheese. Who buys this? (it's not like its some fancy schmancy organic, soy, cheese product, it's beyond generic and processed) It costs the same as real shredded mozzerella cheese.

4. When scrambled I really can't taste the difference between egg beaters and real eggs. Though scrambling with milk and butter kinda defeats the purpose of buying egg beaters.

5. Smaller versions of larger foods are always better -- Mini Pizza Bagels, Mini Tacos, Mini Quiches, Bite-size Samosas, Mini Egg Rolls, Mini Hot Dogs, Mini Burgers...you get the point. My one exception is chocolate chip cookies. GIANT ones are always better.

This is of particular import to all y'all who are going to be in San Fran for Pride Weekend. I'm looking at *you* chreebomb, chitinous, and connculan (omakase I know you're gonna be MIA). Reserve your tickets to see Miz Ginger Snapz do her thang!

Message Butch Action on myspace: http://www.myspace.com/girlezquesf or post here.

There are a limited number of floor seat, and it's super easy to reserve, just send me your email address and I put that info on a list at the door, when you show up you pay only $12!!!!

but be on time..all tickets go for full price 10 minutes before show time!
THURSDAY JUNE 21st
Rick Shaw Stop
155 Fell Street
San Francisco.

Before 6/14 you can reserve non-floor seat tickets for $8.

I made Shrimp Etouffee the other night and my gf (who went to school in Louisiana) said it was goooooooood!!!! (and believe me, when T doesn't like food, EVERYONE knows) I didn't exactly use this recipe but the one here is the very basic framework. To it I added, Cumin, Salt, Pepper, Cayenne instead of Tabasco, Thyme, a pinch of red pepper flakes, and more garlic.

Next time I think I will find a way to use less better but still make a good roux, it was a leetle too buttery for me, but oh so tasty.

Comment in my journal and I will pick three interests and three user-pics from your journal and ask you about them.

poke: mmmm...poke (pronounced Poke-ay) is a delicious raw fish Hawaiian treat. I learned the recipe from my friend Cat, and whenever I can get fresh Sashimi grade albacore or ahi tuna it's poke time.

Here's my (adapted from Cat's)recipe: (serves about 2 hungry highyellas)
1/2-3/4lb raw albacore or ahi tuna
Chinese Hot Mustard Powder
1/4 to 1/6 sweet yellow onion
2 green onion stalks
sea salt
sesame seeds
soy sauce

Mix the mustard power with water or soy sauce and let it "bloom" (it takes a couple of minutes for the hotness to come out). Chop the fish into cubes. Chop the yellow onion. Salt the fish and the onion. Mix in soy sauce to desired saltiness and wetness (I like mine not too wet, so just enough soy for the fish to absorb it all). Add mustard. Finish with green onions and sesame seeds. I like to serve this with fried wonton chips, but apparently that's a really "mainland" thing to do. I've even eaten it with tortilla chips. Most people just eat it plain.

Some people add things like seaweed, use wasabi instead of mustard, sesame oil, lemon juice, cucumbers, etc.

dem: an awesome and truly f*cked up book by William Melvin Kelley. Here is the synopsis from Amazon.com - Originally published in 1967, dem is a classic of the Black Arts Movement. This surrealistic satire lays bare the convoluted and symbiotic relationship between whites and blacks. Upper-middle-class Manhattanite Mitchell Pierce and his wife Tamara enact the twists and turns of human relationships in this startling fable about the intersections of race, class, sex, love, and marriage. Mitchell is convinced he has it made. With advancement at work, an attractive wife, and a comfortable apartment, he has achieved the 1960s version of the white man's American dream. Then, slowly but surely, that dream becomes a nightmare, and Mitchell can't seem to wake up. Did he really find his boss's wife and children dead in an upstairs bedroom of their suburban home? Did his wife really become pregnant after a brief fling with their black maid's boyfriend? Notable as a satiric portrayal of white characters from an African American perspective, this milestone achievement tugs at our ability to suspend disbelief and forces us to reexamine stereotypes from the past and current images in America's racial divide. and sausage.

sausage: I love, love, love sausage, and it seems like most every culture has some kind of ground, spiced, encased meat product (I've noticed something similar with fried dough). Favorites include chorizo, andouille, chinese sausage, linguisa, portugese sausage, hot italian sausage, any sausage with sage and fennel, brats, and nathan's hot dogs

Icons

I call this guy "lil tuff." He's from a picture that someone posted ages ago. He best expresses how I feel when I get angry about racism and ignorance. I know lil tuff got my back.


This is my kitty, sashimi, people always say that she has freakishly big eyes. She has been dubbed by more than one LJ user as "hypnocat"


Pretty self explanatory. I got it from t-shirt hell.

Yay! that was fun.